By now, you’ve all probably heard about the Iraqi terrorist kidnapping of an American G.I. Joe–type doll, photographing it, and holding “him” hostage—all in an effort to pass it off as a real American soldier (although, G.I. Joe is indeed a real American hero…). Well, now that other Jared at Exultate Juste has uncovered a new, more dastardly plot. Hilarious!